A great massage therapist knows they are not a messiah, a prophet, or God’s gift to humanity. They are a human who knows how it feels to hurt and seeks to minimize the suffering of others. Though a massage may feel magical, the therapist knows they are not a sorcerer, their hands are not the reason others heal and they respect the healing process.
Humility is defined by our modesty and fairness, and our inclination to promote others before ourselves. It is the process of seeing life accurately. Are we willing to view our existence in an honest and truthful light? Do we possess the ability to acknowledge our mistakes and limitations? Are we open to the ideas of others? Do we appreciate the world around us, and the contributions others have made?
Humility is the opposite of pride, arrogance, and ego. It is the genuine focus on others, and how they feel. It is an exploration of our shortcomings and the process of seeking ways to overcome them. It helps us observe our mistakes and learn from them. When we possess humility we are willing to be taught, and to learn new ideas. With humility in our life we actively embrace self-correction and improvement.
People who celebrate humility are the best leaders, they are easier to trust, and they possess an increased ability to critically think, socialize, and gain acceptance. We love being around people with humility because they are willing to listen, explore new ideas and take responsibility when they are wrong. We tend to forgive people with humility and enjoy spending time with them. The more humility we have the less stressful life becomes. We begin to appreciate the blessings in the world even when there is no light to be seen. People without humility are quick to make assumptions, they often feel superior to others, and overvalue their self-worth.
How do we develop our humility? We must start by looking inwardly to identify our strengths and weaknesses. We do not need to berate or destroy our confidence; it simply means we must assess where we stand in the world. We may be the main character in our own manuscript, but we are a foot note in most.
Humility should never be confused with a low-self-esteem. Those who view themselves through this lens often lack accuracy in their personal assessment. A humble person is precise and aware of where they stand in the world, and they realize we are a part of a greater whole. A humble person is curious and open to learning more about others and the contributions they make to society.
Humble leaders do not crave credit or undermine their team to feel powerful. They do everything they can to improve and learn from their mistakes. A humble leader seeks to foster humility in their team by granting praise and celebrating their success. They see failure as a natural part of the growing process.
Exploring Humility
The world is an insane place and there seems to be no end in sight. It spins us round and round, twisting our gut till we are about to throw up. With the challenge of life, you’d think we’d be more understanding, but people hurt so much they are blinded by their pain.
We get kicked over and over even after being knocked to our knees. When the assault stops we are granted a reprieve, but we must raise our fists for the next beating. With so much strife it becomes hard to fight. It’s difficult to give a pass when we feel like shattered glass.
I know how much it hurts to feel broken, but we cannot close our eyes. If we do, we lose more than magnificent beauty and infinite wonder. We lose our empathy and ability to see. We must hold onto our wisdom and continue to use empathy. The more empathetic and understanding we are, the more forgiving the world will be.
It’s important to know forgiveness is not forgetfulness. If someone violates or hurts us, we should protect ourselves by doing what needs to be done, but it must stop there. Vengeance is a terrible poison that eats wisdom and destroys our soul. It feeds into the negative cycle of the world and as massage therapists we need to be a part of the solution. If those words are not enough to guide you away from the bitterness of vengeance I have something for you to consider. What kind of life would you be living if the world vowed vengeance on you for every misstep, wrong and crime you committed? It would be terrible. The world doesn’t need you to be judge, jury, and executioner, it needs you to spread love, hope, and happiness.
I know how it feels to be in pain, it can be horrible, but making someone else hurt isn’t going to take away your pain, it only worsens it. At the end of the day I believe everyone can learn from their mistakes. When I take a misstep, sometimes I stumble, and if I fall I hope someone is rooting for me to get back up. We all make mistakes or commit to decisions that lead to disaster. We are not a saint, everyone has hurt someone, no one is perfect, so have faith and make the world a better place.
A lack of humility manifests in many ways. Sometimes as therapists we help so many people we start thinking we wield the gifts of God. When I was going through chemotherapy I met another soul who shared the same trade as you and I. It was apparent she allowed her ability to overcome her humility. We can learn from her mistakes by avoiding the hardships self-obsession can cause.
A Personal Story
I was sitting outside of my favorite coffee house enjoying a hot cup of Highlander Grog. It was a reprieve from the hell I just experienced. I spent the last two weeks in bed recovering from my last chemotherapy treatment. The next infusion was around the corner and the thought of it filled me with dread.
It was chilly outside, and I was bundled up more than most. The cold air felt frigid against my hairless scalp, so I wrapped my hands around the heated cup. It felt good even though my fingers were numb. The day was good, the sun was out, and I was enjoying the time I had to myself. A cool wind floated against my skin and my teeth began to chatter. At this point I had enough of the outside air. I began to rise when a woman stepped outside. I smiled at her as I began collecting my things. She walked up to me and asked if I had cancer. I nodded my head yes. She looked at my bald head and said, “I can help you.”
I shook my head. “I’ve got it, I don’t really have much stuff.”
She raised her hands like she was casting a spell then closed her eyes. A moment later she opened them and said: “I have healed you. Now you no longer have cancer, and you can stop your chemotherapy.” She seemed so happy with herself.
I paused for a moment to think about what she had said. “What?”
“I’m a massage therapist, I used Reiki to heal you. All of your cancer is gone. Now you no longer have to keep getting treatments.”
I blinked my eyes a few times thinking about what she just said. “Yeah, I think I will have to pass. I am going to keep on with them, I would very much like to continue living.” I collected my things and went inside.
Humility is a Guide
Personal boundaries help us navigate the world by erecting walls that may guide us even when we are blind. When we interact with others we often cannot discern where we are supposed to step or where the road ends. Humility serves as our guide; it helps us avoid stumbling into walls or falling into traps.
Sometimes we say and do things because we are afraid, sometimes it is because our heart is hurting so much we need to desperately help stop the suffering of others. I am certain this woman meant well, and she believed her divine will was enough to cure my cancerous cells. In many ways I appreciate her generosity and desire to help me. She believed she was a healer and her urgency to help allowed her ego to take hold of her actions. If she had acted with humility she would have considered the ramifications of her words. She would have considered the results of her actions and took the time to see the world outside of her limited sphere of influence and understanding. Her heart would have considered my reality, took it into consideration and weighed the pros and cons of her actions.
If I chose to accept her healing as truth, maybe it would have transformed my body and helped me heal. But, what if it didn’t? Would she have taken responsibility for the direction of my life if I took her advice and died?
Humility grants us the opportunity to consider the realities of others. It reminds us that we are still human, that we can make mistakes, and are prone to great errors in judgement. As a massage therapist it is easy to get caught up in the praise. The transformative benefits of presence, intent and touch can feel miraculous, but it is important to remember that our hands were not forged from the divine. We are not an angel, the Messiah, or God’s gift to mankind.
